My Life Race Track: August 2011

I`ve Come to realize

We can`t impose to someone to love us the way we love them. For love, it should not be dictated, nor to ask for... It should be felt wholeheartedly without but`s and If`s...

And I have come to realize that... Yes! he is the guy that I want and loved... though he said he likes me ... but still I can`t considered him as mine... And I dont need to do things to make him love me. If he wanted to he would... And If he wants his freedom... I`m not in position not to let him go... Even how hard it was, and painful it would be...

Laugh trip

Hiking was not able to pursue because of heavy rain due to typhoon Mina. But, we don`t let bad weather spoil our long weekend. Instead we changed the plan... Alabang trip would do, but we end up in a comedy bar last Saturday night.

SITCOM comedy bar at Las Pinas is a great place to hangout with friends. Stand-up comedians and other performers will not disappoint you... definitely you will laugh into tears, until your jaw locks ( hahaha)

Want some evidence, pick one ... bwahahhaha

truth hurts ;-(

And he answered... Honestly YES!!!

It`s like bomb trigger my heart... and shattered in to pieces. I feel cold and my body had been paralyzed at the moment. Catching my breath, my pulse beat faster.`till my tears falls on my cheeks. Biting my lips and covering my mouth not to make sound that I`m crying. I`m in pain... No one can save me, and I know very well that I`m the only one who can save myself from this inevitable truth. I just closed my eyes to bear the pain...

Craving for Adventure

Here I go again... craving for somewhere to go to have fun and adventure. Start this coming weekend, we have three consecutive long weekends. So, I`m having this in my mind to go somewhere else. New place again to explore.

Last week, I shared this to Gelo, and he suggested Pagsanjan. And I agree with his suggestion. Pagsanjan is just a part of Laguna but I haven`t been there. And I added, that after going to Pagsanjan, maybe we could hike at Mount Makiling.

Haaiiyyy... I really want to go, hopefully we could pursue this in one of the long weekends that we have. For sure this would be fun and exciting, especially if all of us can go.

Crazy me : Missing Him

It just been days, haven`t talk to him... And I miss him this much...

If this is one of my abnormalities, I don`t know. But I decided to

make little distance from him. Though, he is miles away from me, I refrain myself to talked to him, I restrict myself to be online when I know he is there.

I know this is strange, but, even myself couldn`t understand

and explain how I feel, I miss him but I want to keep distant.

If this is have something to do with may past, and thinking

not to be hurt again. Again, I don`t know. But not a single day

I never think of him, from the morning when I wake up until

I sleep.

I miss our usual chat conversation, even most of the time

we argue on some things. I miss his jokes which I usually

say it was corny but I laugh. The most is I miss the " I love you

and the I love you too "

Just to fill in with him, I get back on his text messages

on my phone, read my inbox on my YM, sneak time to

activate my FB again to saw his photos and read the

our chat archives. Missing him, put me in tears... I know..

what you are thinking... yes, maybe! this is the crazy me.

Been a Teacher

I never dream to be a teacher nor hated to be one. But I know, I don`t have that patience that a Teacher must have.

As one of the... say.., "Seniors" in the company and pioneer on the Analysis Job. I`ve been given the task to the training for the New hired Associates for the Analysis. Though, this is not new to me, since I also trained the rest of the Senior Associates. The difference is, all seniors have already a knowledge about the software we`re using, unlike with the new hired, we`re going to start from the scratch.

I`m their teacher for a month, and it will end this Friday. Training is over. And it feels good to know that I shared what I`ve also learned inside the company. It`s like an achievement to me, to be part of one person`s development as they gain knowledge and skills. Hoping, that they really gain and learn even a little from me.

" A teacher affects eternity: he can never tell where his influence stops" - Henry Adams

Take a Break

This is my entry to Techie She Lucky Blogger Weekly Giveaways Week 10. This week’s prize is $10 Cash via Paypal from Mel Cole of Hearts Content of a Mama.

I`m not feeling comfortable on what is in my heart. I`m not very sure of what is going on, but my instinct is insisting it loud, that things are not going to be good. The feeling is not new to me, that is why, it`s quite alarming. If I`m just getting paranoid, well then... things are good...

I`m not going to run away. But I think, I have to take a break. I decided to deactivate my FB account for some reasons. And hopefully it could help. That when I get back, I `ll be on the right track.

One Item of Happiness

Smile still in my face until now, having in my mind what I have received yesterday from person so dear to me. One item, I really love and fond of. And if only I could shout it loud here all the details, without getting into trouble ( hehehehe ) I would... but I can`t.

I`m not expecting, but I have it and it brought so much happiness to me. And I will treasure this one for the rest of my life.

Repost : Bicthology

When I stand up for myself and my beliefs,

they call me a bitch.

When I stand up for those I love,

they call me a bitch.

When I speak my mind, think my own thoughts or do

things my own way, they call me a bitch.

Being a bitch means I won't compromise what's in

my heart. It means I live my life MY way. It

means I won't allow anyone to step on me.

When I refuse to tolerate injustice and

speak against it, I am defined as a bitch.

The same thing happens when I take time for

myself instead of being everyone's maid.

It means I have the courage and strength to

allow myself to be who I truly am and won't

become anyone else's idea of what

they think I "should" be.

I am outspoken, opinionated and determined.

I want what I want and there is

nothing wrong with that!

So try to stomp on me, try to douse my inner flame,

try to squash every ounce of beauty I hold

within me. You won't succeed. And if

that makes me a bitch, so be it.

I embrace the title and am proud to bear it !!!!

Unload

This is my entry to Techie She’s Lucky Blogger Weekly Giveaways Week 9. This week’s prize is $10 paypal credits from Lainy of Lainy’s Musings.

I felt so heavy inside, that I can`t focus on things I need to do. My mind is too much preoccupied of things, which I don`t know if it`s all necessary. I need to unload, so I can breath and think better. My heart and mind needs musing time to regain its real substance.